My addiction to the invisible finish line
I’ve got a little habit that’s becoming an ugly addiction -
I could put a stop to it…but I’m simply not doing much about it.
Around 9:15ish every night, I give a big yawn & say G’night to my husband & son –
They’re eager to start watching something violent and distasteful – so they gleefully blow kisses my way…
‘NIGHT, Mom!
‘NIGHT, Babes.
The dog follows me. The cats follow me.
And I am FINALLY ALONE.
I crawl into bed and…
open up Tik Tok.
Once there, for a glorious HOUR, I scrollllll. Enjoying the dancing, the positivity, the ridiculousness –
Basking in the anonymity - because I’m not following a SOUL I know – everyone is a stranger to me, but also a friendly face.
On my For You Page, a skit plays out of New Year’s Eve 2020-….
Picture this: the Countdown begins. 10…9….3…2..1 🎉 🍾
And the clock changes from 11:59
To 11:60.
And 2020 KEEPS FRIGGIN GOING>
The joke played on, but I had to scroll away. I couldn’t BEAR the thought of it!
Seriously. I was disturbed – but WHY? The video was silly. Ridiculous.
Why did it cut so close for me?
It made me realize I’ve created a FINISH LINE for all this BULLSHIT:
December 31st, 2020.
Hmph.
I’ve been expecting this year to miraculously come to an end because of my ridiculous mental markers.
These invisible finish lines where I believed FER SHER shit would be ‘back to normal’.
“Summer 2020.” Yup. I fantasized that we’d have a normal summer.
Then – when that blew up, I DEFINITELY thought September was the big one! Because – helllooooo- September is the New January, right? I get to start over again.
NOPE>
I’m doing it again! Holding on to New Years, 2020 – fantasizing the bells will chime, the ball will drop, and POOF!
Are you doing this too? (Is it just me?)
Here’s why I’m doing it: relief just will not COME.
All around me – my friends, my clients, my city, the country - the world – there is no relief for too many people.
The hits keep coming. Really serious shit like -
People struggling with trauma that’s finally risen to the surface…
Forest fires choking out the sun & weighing down the air…
Businesses closing down…
I’m talking about how vital it is to talk about & normalizing what we’re struggling with because shoving it down doesn’t get us to the next place we want to go.
The weight, the sadness – it’s GRIEF.
Now, 136 years ago, in April, I did an INCREDIBLY helpful interview with Life Coach Jess Ryan –
Who’s trained & has an expertise in GRIEF.
What it is. What it isn’t. And how to deal –
FOR REAL.
She TAUGHT SO MUCH that it brought be RELIEF.
Our interview is one of my most watched videos ever – and it’s time to share it with you here.
If you’ve been feeling knocked out, dragged down, crawling towards a finish line that keeps moving on you –
You MUST listen to what she shares.
It was not only informative and educational – IT WAS HOPEFUL.
You’ll walk away with a shift in how to deal with the landscape we’re in right now –
Please watch it here – or listen to it on my podcast.
It’s important that we acknowledge & normalize what we’re going through, because
shoving away our REAL emotions –
Never giving them space…
Not sitting with them…
Well, I can tell you personally – and professionally from working with my clients –
It is this shoving away that causes pain.
Jessica takes us through HOW to move with the pain – to move through it…
You can reply to me and tell me the #1 thing you’re frustrated with, fearful of, and angry about – I’m here to merely receive it…
Because saying it to SOMEONE might be a helpful first step toward feeling a little bit better…
