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I was fat on my dream vacation

Oct 23, 2018

So. I was fat on my vacation.

I knew about this vacation for months. It was 7 years in the making, and I wanted it to be amazing.

And I was fat on my vacation.

I wanted to experience everything there was to experience in Hawaii and do ALL. THE. THINGS.

I wanted to look good in my clothes, feel comfortable in a modest bathing suit, and be fit enough to do the badass things you can do in Hawaii.

But I was fat on my vacation.

I never got around to losing the weight I’ve gained over the last 6 months. I didn’t get in shape. I didn’t kick my...

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The story that kept her stuck for 20 years!

Oct 23, 2018

She was irritated with and disappointed in her husband. Again.

For her birthday she wanted to try a new place in town.  She set them up to go – reservations & a sitter – even though she knew he wouldn’t enjoy it.

Then she got stuck in her head with a huge story about what the night would be like.

She believed…

  • he’d rather stay home and watch an important ball game on TV that night.
  • he’d be distant when they got there – watching the game over her head at the bar.
  • he’d have a negative ‘tude about...
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Talking myself onto the ledge...of an 80-foot tree!

Oct 23, 2018

 

SO – here’s the truth: I don’t enjoy doing things I don’t know how to do already. I'm a A self-proclaimed Non-Adventurer.

If things are physically hard or uncomfortable or fear-inducing, I’m usually OUT.

No thanks.  I’m good. I’ll just stay home, thankyouverymuch.

Oh Yeah – I’m a real blast to have around.

IMG_9322 4

But here we are, on vacation in a paradise, and the internets have revealed a two-hour zip-lining tour through the tree canopies of Maui.

You “jump” from tree to tree,...

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How she knew her marriage was over

Oct 23, 2018

A friend had been hanging on to her lifeless, lonely marriage for a while. For lots of reasons.

She was so unhappy – so was her hubs.

I asked, “Where were you with this a year ago?”

She stared at me: “Exactly where I am now.”

She’d known for a while. But things had gotten worse. A little harder to bear. A lot sadder.

I asked her to think about what her life would be like one year from now if she stayed exactly where she was.

She physically shuddered. Scrunched up her face.

She did not want that.

We talked about how fast...

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My superpower is NOT mental masturbation

Oct 23, 2018

For years, I had a low sense of worth in the workplace.

What was I good at? What was my “special sauce”? What was my Superpower?

I was constantly intimidated by the visionaries in my midst.

You know the type: the people who think big, original thoughts.

They ask, “What if…” and love to consider all the possibilities.

The Creatives.

The Creatives are AMAZING. They can see #wayoutthere, beyond the Now, into the Future.

They are the reason All Good Things ever happen, right?

Since I was never going to be one of them, I wasn’t useful in the world. 

...

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Three steps to deal with the piano that just fell on your head

Oct 23, 2018

I watched the blood bubble form on my right index finger. Time slowed down.

Should I throw the needle away and pretend none of this happened?

Go to Public Safety and report the incident?

The Universe has a way of whispering to us, tapping us on our shoulders, shoving us against the wall, and – when we refuse to listen – dropping the piano on our head.

Getting pricked with a random needle sitting on a desk was certainly in the realm of getting a piano dropped on my head.

Here’s the quick & dirty version: I’d gone into the library to...

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Have you hit a wall?

Oct 23, 2018

She is a force of nature. Writing a book. Building her business. Developing her community.

Her job? She helps women discover their voice and step into leadership.

She is a shark: moving constantly and getting stuff D.O.N.E.

Her energy is endless. Others marvel at what she gets done. Some are put off by her intense determination. But nothing stops her.

Until it does. Then she hits a wall.

You know the type of wall: suddenly, inertia. Paralysis.

Then comes the self-loathing and self-judgment. Ever been there?

Working together last week, I noticed a sense of...

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The time-mastery strategies my clients love to hate

Oct 23, 2018

She looked at me sadly. She was frazzled, scattered, chaotic, tired, overwhelmed, frustrated.

It was Session 3, and there was disappointment in her eyes.

She hired me to help her “get her sh*t together”.

Like many clients, time was her worst enemy & made her feel like…

  • A failure because she lost the race every day.
  • A hopeless mess because she never accomplished anything.
  • An oppressed slave to her to-do list.

Her excitement from Sessions 1 & 2 had waned by Session 3.

She was tired of the effort it was taking.

Heaving a loud sigh, she...

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When there's nothing left to give..Part Deux

Oct 23, 2018

Last week I told the story of Liz’s burnout.

Here’s the story of my burnout.

I was hopeless. I had to keep churning forward & giving more. Why? Because – dammit – that’s what was expected of me!

I had nothing left to give. I was crispy. Irritated.

And I was terrified. I could not see my way out of a hopeless situation.

I mean – really – nothing had changed…except I was burned out.

Everyone still needed me. Everyone still expected me to show up and provide.

Here’s why it was hopeless: I was allowing...

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When there's just no more to give - Part One

Oct 23, 2018

For today’s story, you need to know 3 things:

  1. Diane, 59-years-old, bullies her sister Liz every day.
  2. Their mom, 92, suffers with dementia & serious physical disabilities.
  3. Liz is an over-giver.

Liz constantly replays the interactions with her sister in her mind.

She doesn’t sleep well. And, she worries about her mom all the time.

Liz told me, Diane demands that I be available to help Mom at all hours. She takes off whenever she needs to. But if I need a break, she is so mean to me!

Exhausted, she hasn’t spent any time with her husband...

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